Wednesday, August 28, 2013

New and refined translation of the first strophe

After a consultation about the first raw translation I made I have started to think through once again the translation of the first strophe. If I compare the first strophe with the second, I have to admit that the first one's meaning and function is more obvious than the second one. The first strophe might have a religious concern, but the second strophe is clearly secular: a love poem.

So here you go: the second and refined translation of the first strophe:





Sîon, trûre

dîn burchmûre hât von schûre

und von winde manigen stôz.


Darnach weine

dem ortsteine der alleine

dîne wende tzusamne slôz:


Den wînt nam abe mit tzangen

sînen kloben, nû lâ toben

daz volc, lâ die wahtaer slâfen!


Der küninc ist ûf gegangen

und sîn her an die wer

owê wâfen, îmmer wâfen!


Waz sol echt nu hie geschen?

der künic wil sen

wie sîn stat behüetet sî.


Son engilt nicht wan der tôt

– owê der nôt! –

her ist mit tzôrne bî.


Noch wachent alle

vûr dem walle, wachent wol
dâ man wachen sol!

Sion, mourn:

your walls weakened

from of the thunderstorms and the wind


After that, cry

for the capstone, for the only one,

that would keep your walls firm.


The wind took with pincers

its solidity*; the folk

raves now, and the ward sleeps!


The king is gone out

and his army is unarmed;

Alas, to arms, always to arms!


What should happen here now?

The King wants to see

that his city is safe.


So there’s nothing except Death

– alas! the danger! –

he is here with anger.


Still keep watching out

for the walls... watch indeed
keep watching where one needs to watch!


*viz. the capstone’s solidity, its power to keep the walls firm